The Haggis

Seen on dreary foggy days,
Across the glens the haggis play.
On Tuesday hunts with guns and hound,
They follow tracks left in the ground,
For 3 legged haggis raid farm and field,
Stealing sheep and oatmeal. These pests found in burrows and digs,
Look a little like baby pigs!
I assure you they aren’t half as sweet,
But in Scotland they are great to eat!

Desperately trying to get caught up, this poem comes from The Untold Stories of Scotland.

I know today is meant for J, but I fell behind due to juggling hospital visits and I’m due to start a new job on Monday. Very up and down time so a little cheating on the challenge is necessary.

My best friend once told me haggis were three legged creatures. I am incredibly gullible but I am not that bad, yet I still wrote this rhyme.

This is my H poem for the A to Z challenge.


The Fears

I recently read a post where the blogger decided to share their fears. I liked this, because my brain decides that I have loads.

Since being little I have suffered from night terrors, In other words I scream in my sleep. At what? Well anything, the thing is when I wake up in fits of panic I have no or very little idea of what I am scared of. But of those I do remember, I have been frightened of a Polaroid camera that was sat on a shelf, a boat, spiders and Dracula. In fact usually they are totally irrational.

But like everyone I have some fears in ‘real life’ too…

Heights – Been trying to conquer this for a while now, by trying things like abseiling the Tyne Bridge and climbing York Minster. Climbing to the top of York minster led to a mild panic attack whilst on all fours, refusing to stand up. I was talked through it by a guy with a very strong german accent. He pointed to a rickety wooden ladder up the side of the building and said “at least you don’t have to climb that ladder”, helping me up and onto the next lot of stairs, to an amazing view…. Wouldn’t do it again.
It hasn’t done me any favours, my boyfriend recently went up to the Skydeck in Melbourne, Australia, and I got the willies from even the photos. He is certain he’ll get me to go up there, but I’m rather certain I won’t.

Masks – Ok I admit, this one is irrational. I blame horror movies, proving that anyone in a mask is going to murder you and chop you up with a butchers knife. Kabuki masks are by far the worst, it’s the whole emotionless or blank expression that unnerves me. Even opening the door to five year olds on Halloween is a challenge.

Woodlice – yea those horrible grey scuttling creatures. Spiders, although not being their biggest fan, I can do the whole pop a glass over and throw them outside, but Woodlice are a different story. I have once been confined to the bathroom for an hour and a half till my brother searched the whole of the house to get rid of it!

Am I dramatic? Absolutely. But I blame my mother, and the almighty freak-outs when a butterfly comes near her.

So do you have any fears?

Alphabet Zoo – The Elephant

The elephants in our British zoo,
Are always catching colds and flus,
Because they come from the sun,
Where temperature peak at 41.
And imagine if you had a nose,
Longer than a garden hose,
Imagine if you had to sneeze,
With your nose so long and free,
You’d try to blow a sweet Achoo,
That sounds more like a big HAROOOO!

Alphabet Zoo – The Dung Beetle

For why you’d want to be a bug,
That spends it’s day rolling dung,
From camels cows and kangaroos,
This beetle collects and rolls it’s poos,
And stores it fresh in a hole,
For dinner, stews and casseroles,
Once he made a huge poo pie,
And invited round the bugs to try.
Cockroach he turned up his nose,
And said that pie just didn’t go,
Cricket said I won’t eat that,
Lady bird: ‘that will make me fat’,
The fly he said I don’t share my dung,
And beetle gagged and off he run.
The dung bug sighed and then he,
Thought and thought ‘well more for me’.

Alphabet Zoo – The Camel

A camel, is a magnificent beast,
From Africa and the Middle East.
But the camel Here in alphabet zoo,
Came from the land Timbuktu.
And when we noticed something wrong,
Our camel did not run along,
He did not eat or roll in sand,
He did not spit or help out man,
We told our vet, our camel grumps,
He suggested he must have the hump!

This poem is part of Alphabet Zoo, you can find this in my categories. The idea of it is some light hearted humorous poems, to get my mind in gear for the April A-Z Challenge.

Alphabet Zoo – The Jazz Bee

Exhibit 2, we call ‘The Jive’
Is of course the Jazz bee Hive.
Jazz bees named because of that,
They dance and sing and bop and scat.
Music made by the sound of wings,
The band they named themselves the stings,
There’s bee bop and bee bop skeet,
They’re on rhythm bass and beat,
On vocal we have the Honey pack,
And Bugabee sings and plays the sax.
And after a few nectar brews,
The jazz bees bop in ones and twos.

The Challenge

Sign up for the A-Z April challenge has begun, leaving us with just 2 months to prepare, and this year I MUST prepare.

You can see last years challenge by clicking on my categories and viewing ‘A-Z April 2012 Challenge’. After finding and signing up to the challenge just a few days before it started, I left myself unprepared and most poems were wrote on the day in very little time. So this year I have learned from my mistakes and I’m all geared up for the challenge.

My creative cogs haven’t been turning in a while, and I haven’t wrote properly since around June last year. So the challenge may be a little more of an effort this year.

A fellow blogger decided he would get back into it by doing his own A-Z, and I’m joining him by writing Alphabet Zoo.

You can find Alphabet Zoo in my categories, they are silly and fun little poems, based around the idea of a zoo tour, and is simply just to get my mind working in rhyme again.

For the April 2013 A-Z Challenge, my poems will all be based on a theme. Last year my poems were all on varied subjects, and allowed me to write in ways I hadn’t before and on subjects I would normally disregard. But this year I have the idea of perhaps basing an E-book on what I write, and therefore sticking to one theme. But you will have to wait and see what that is!

So now you are here, snoop around, read some poems and have a laugh. Being out the blogosphere for a while I feel neglected, so a comment would be a treat!

If you’d like to follow my progress and join the Alphabet zoo tour, well Today is B! This will be posted later today, tomorrow will be C and so on and so forth. You can also follow me on twitter @Amy_Dot90

If you would like to sign up for the challenge visit:
Or follow on twitter: @AprilA2Z